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Issue 44: Happy Holidays from the NBA and Crisp Bounce Pass

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It’s beginning to look a lot like Christmas, both in the world around us and the NBA. There are five games on the docket today, and while plenty of memorable moments have happened during Christmas Day contests, we’re not worried about any of that in this issue.

Nope, today is simply a pair of Christmas-themed videos the league and one of its teams have produced. Let’s kick it off with a stunning rendition of “Jingle Bells.”

Jingle Hoops

To celebrate the 2013 Christmas Day slate, the NBA dashed through the snow in a one-horse open sleigh.

And of course, by that I mean they had five players shooting baskets (and a sixth player making a cameo at the end), with each one tuned up to a different note. A few notable things from this video:

  • “Jingle Bells” is a shockingly easy song to play. As the commercial indicates, there are only five notes. If you’ve ever wanted to learn an instrument (guitar, piano, harpsichord, etc.), this tune could be a good place to start.
  • As of this writing, only two of the six players featured here are still on their current teams. Steve Nash has since retired, while Derrick Rose, Kevin Durant, and LeBron James are all at least two teams removed from their squads in this video.
  • Thanks to YouTuber iPodKingCarter, who points out there are a combined 77 points in this 30-second commercial. Talk about efficiency!

Chicago Bulls Sing “The 12 Days of Christmas”

Many Christmas songs embrace repetition — after all, it’s easier to sing along if you know what’s coming up — but “The Twelve Days of Christmas” may take the cake.

Luckily, it’s that level of repetition that makes this song such a prime choice for parody. You can give literally any gift among the 12 verses, and the 2009-10 Chicago Bulls take advantage of that, despite a few lazy verses, like Derrick Rose singing the actual lyric of “five golden rings.”

I also appreciate the team recognizes the song takes a long time. They throw Benny the Bull in there to encourage everyone to speed things along and skip past several verses to the 12th day. Well done, Benny.

Also, I love that they put Ronnie Brewer as the “alley-oops” guy when I don’t think he ever tried to throw an alley-oop during his entire career in Chicago.

The Best “Wired” Christmas Day Quotes

The NBA often likes to “wire” up its players to give fans a taste of what the action is like on the court. It did so on Christmas Day back in 2017, and shared a highlight package that we can cherish every year.

As you may expect, much of what gets said is probably not suitable for a family audience, so we often get some duds (a la the preview gif of this video, where Philadelphia’s Ben Simmons doesn’t know where to stand).

However, there are still a few notable gems in here. John Wall misses a dunk and Kyrie Irving later tells him he missed his highlight. Jae Crowder is friendly with fans in the front row and tells them they have great seats (they seem perplexed). And Draymond Green is at least 30 decibels louder than everyone else. Merry Christmas, indeed.

The Betting Area

With five games scheduled for today, you have plenty of exciting action to watch. If betting is legal in your state, you can play at BetRivers and BetMGM AND score a deposit match up to $250 or $500, depending on your state.

Pennsylvania

Get an instant deposit match up to $250 at BetRivers.

Illinois

Get an instant deposit match up to $250 at BetRivers.

Colorado, Indiana, and Tennessee

Get an instant deposit match up to $500 at BetMGM.

And because I always enjoy a good line or two, I’ll give you my picks for today. You can probably pick against me and have stellar results.

Los Angeles Lakers (-6.5) over Dallas Mavericks

Brooklyn Nets (-3) over Boston Celtics

My overall record: 1-1

Gambling problem? Call 1-800-GAMBLER (NJ/PA/IL) or 1-800-9-WITH-IT (IN only) or 1-800-BETS-OFF (IA only) or 1-800-522-4700 (CO Only) or TN REDLINE: 800-889-9789.

That’s all ’til next time. I’m taking the rest of the year off and encourage you to get some relaxation in, too. Thanks for reading and I’ll see you in 2021!

Joey

P.S. Did you get this email forwarded to you? Subscribe to Crisp Bounce Pass here.

joey

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