In the week following the Super Bowl, I’ve witnessed a lot of chatter about different commercials that aired during the game.
We saw Peyton Manning make about 78 separate appearances (here’s my favorite). LeBron James was in a cryptocurrency commercial. The Sopranos made a nice little comeback in the name of electric vehicles. Larry David was himself, also in a crypto ad.
In fact, I’ve seen multiple people and publications claim the Coinbase ad—which was literally a silent QR code bouncing around a screen, like an old DVD screensaver—was the best of the Super Bowl. I’m not linking it because I don’t want to waste your time.
If we’re at the point where that’s the “best” of anything, then we might as well just call it a day and pack up humanity.
HOWEVER, watching all of these commercials made me nostalgic for a particular favorite of mine. It’s 13 years old but happens to involve a frequent Super Bowl participant (Snickers) and someone who never won a championship (Patrick Ewing).
Unlike the Coinbase commercial, something actually happens in this one. In fact, a LOT goes on in just 15 seconds.
We go from our protagonist opening up a Snickers in a way I have never seen before. He rips off half the packaging in one fell swoop.
I have tried opening a Snickers in the same fashion every single time I’ve had a Snickers bar in my possession. I’m convinced it can’t be done. This man, who we’ll later learn is named Ryan, might be a wizard.
Then Patrick Ewing shows up. Only it’s not Patrick Ewing when a Snickers is involved. It’s Patrick Chewing. He greets Ryan pleasantly enough, but the affection is short-lived before he ferociously dunks on him.
The actual dialogue of this commercial features five words (six, if you count a scream):
“Patrick?”
“What’s up, Ryan?”
“Oops.”
A mere five words, but a legacy nonetheless. Let’s all strive for such efficiency.
It's been a hot minute since we've featured a player in the Crisp Bounce Pass…
Astute observers may realize the NBA season is currently not going on. That means players…
If you have an account on TikTok or Instagram, you've most certainly seen the barrage…
This newsletter has covered the wonderful duo between basketball and rappers before, but there are…
There's a relic of network television shows that doesn't necessarily make sense in today's world…
Our favorite sport has come a long way from the days of the peach basket.…